5 min read

10 Powerful Ways to Build Resilience

Have you ever struggled through a task or activity?
Have you ever lost someone you truly care about?
Had you ever had your heart broken?
Have you ever been bullied or abused?
Have you ever struggled through infertility, mental illness, suicide?
Have you ever failed at something?

We experience many difficult situations in life, some are easier to overcome than others. One thing for sure is no matter who you are or where you come from, adversity is likely to take place at some point during your journey of life if it already hasn’t.

So why is it that some people are able to overcome challenges faster than others?

Certainly, overcoming pain and challenges is not easy for anyone. However, there are some factors that contribute to successful outcomes such as optimism, the ability to regulate emotions, and the ability to see failure as an opportunity for growth. These factors are present in highly resilient people.

Resilience is your ability to bounce back from adversity. Resilience can be built and strengthened and I am going to share with you how.

Here are 10 ways to build resilience:

1. Establish a large network of positive relationships

Positive relationships are key to fostering connectedness and meaning. Positive relationships help you build and create shared meaning. They offer you the support you need to keep going regardless of your challenges. They offer you the validation outside of yourself to elevate your positive beliefs. Positive relationships are like a backbone that provides you the support to keep moving when you are too tired to stand alone.

2. Focus on what is in your control

A person’s locus of control can be internal or external. Internal locus of control is when the individual perceives they are in control of what happens to them. External locus of control is when the individual attributes what happens to them to external factors. An internal locus of control is connected to greater resilience because we can control what we do, not what happens to us.

3. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of cultivating awareness in the present moment. Mindfulness is about repeatedly and intentionally focusing attention on the present moment. Overserving your present reality through your sensations without judgment. Simply letting thoughts, observations and feelings arise with kindness and acceptance.

4. Take action of recommendations without judgment

Many times we can find ourselves saying “that is not going to work,” “I tried everything,” or “nothing is going to work.” These are all limiting beliefs that prevent us from growing past our struggles. If more than one person suggested the same thing to you, it might be a good time to try it with an open mind and see the positive changes it can bring to your life.

5. Take full ownership of good and bad

Taking full ownership means taking ownership of both the good and the bad. When we are struggling or unhappy, we can easily shift to 101 reasons why something is bad and we need to get rid of it. That often limits our perceptions to the goodness of it. Try reminding yourself why you started it in the first place. Focus on slow gradual change rather than an escape. This will instill hope and stimulate your motivation to work through your challenges instead of avoiding them.

6. Step back from the situation and breathe

Often times, things can escalate to a point beyond our control. If you find your engagement is escalating in the opposite direction you are hoping for, step back and give yourself a few minutes to breathe and restore your sense of awareness and control.

7. Slow down your thinking

When under stress, our brain can be triggered causing distorted thinking such as jumping to conclusions or taking things personally. In such instances, it is important to slow down your thinking to identify these patterns. Ask yourself:

What is the challenges I am experiencing?
What thoughts am I having about this challenge?
Are these thoughts realistic or emotional?
How do these thoughts impact how I behave and feel?

These questions can help you put things in perspective and facilitate processing.

8. Practice self-compassion

We criticize ourselves because we want to grow and excel, too much negative self-talk can impact the way we think and feel about ourselves. Make sure you recognize your accomplishments and give yourself the credit you deserve. Practice being kind to yourself and evaluate if what you are doing is helping you toward your goal.

9. Take time to be grateful

Practicing gratitude is linked to mental well-being because it focuses on the things we are grateful for in our life. When we focus on things we are grateful for, we focus on the positives and we recognize their value in our lives. We are more likely to engage in something meaningful and look for solutions, not problems. When we focus on things we want to fix, we focus on the negative things in life. Focusing on negativity doesn’t solve the struggle, it enhances it.

10. Practice self-care

I cannot stress self-care enough these days. Self-care is essential in order for you to recharge your well-being so you are able to bring your best self to every situation. Changes are always happening around us that sometimes restrict us from being able to do our preferred self-care routines. It is important to introduce yourself to a variety of self-care techniques so you don’t fall into a place of negligence toward your well-being. If you love to run outside when it was hot, what do you do when it is cold? Make sure you have a self-care plan that covers different domains of life.

If you find yourself struggling, remember we are in this together. Mental Health Counselors are available at Naya Clinics to inspire you to become the best version of yourself!